Home Sweet Home... Alone: Some Closing Thoughts

When I got home on Thursday, August 2, my family was away camping. Although I was more than anxious to see them, I got some much needed alone time.

I know I've already talked about some reverse culture shock, and after my stay in New York and Missouri, I was already reclimatized to the United States enough. But being home though adds something to the mix. I'm having some pretty condradictory feelings. There's so much to say, I hardly know where to begin...

I learned that I'm more capable and independent than I thought. I also learned that there will always be people I need to rely on, especially my church family. I took on traveling alone well enough, and I even thought I'd do alright in London by myself, but I was glad to find church family around the world to be there for me. In Lithuania, I found myself far more bold than I expected. I was okay with getting around, going places alone, and asking questions. It definitely drew me out of my shell. But again, I was greatful for my church family who made my stay incredibly more enjoyable and fulfilling.

I also learned a lot about culture and cultural differences. The program at ISM threw groups together from various countries, forcing us to work together and attempt to bridge the gaps and see eye to eye. This experience definitely helped me understand and appreciate the differences between people.

This leads me to say a little about my thoughts on globalization. I honestly didn't have too much of a positive or negative view of globalization before my travels, and now I can say much the same, only with a little more thought backing it up. I think globalization is a good thing in the aspects for what it can to for an economy. One of the friends I made in Lithuania at the church told me that in recent years, a lot of Lithuanian young people have been leaving the country to try to get a better chance for work elsewhere. Globalization can help this in a sense, possibly bringing more jobs to the country and thus boosting the economy. However, I understand that globalization can be detremental to a society's culture. All things considered, globalization is a good thing as long as the people of a society can hold firm to their culture and its elements.

After this experience and learning about people and places around the world, coming home to Colorado was bittersweet. I love this state, and I've lived here my entire life, but it almost felt like returning to a little box when I have had a chance to explore and venture much further out. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad to be back, but I feel like a bird that just was made to return to a cage. Nonetheless, I am excited to return to UNC in the fall.

I do plan on returning to Lithuania, and if you want that whole story, read "The Bigger Picture: A God Thing," a post on this blog that you can get to by following this link:  http://growinglobal.blogspot.com/2012/07/bigger-picture-god-thing.html

I'm excited for what the future holds, and I definitely recommend an experience like this for everyone who has the chance.

NABQT

One of my Bible quizzing coaches, Krystal, came to pick me up at the airport in St. Louis. I was greeted by a warm hug, and then we were off to the Renaissance Hotel, where we were staying and where the North American Bible Quiz Tournament (NABQT) was taking place.

I have to be honest, at this point, I wasn't very excited for nationals. I was missing Lithuania more than anything, and although it was nice to see my friends from back home, I didn't want to be back home. Orientation that evening seemed to drag on. Then we got some bad news.

I was on a team of five, and our usual team captain who is our best quizzer, was also on her way back from Europe, was sick and missed her connecting flight in New Orleans. She would not be there the next day for our first quiz.

So Sunday morning, we went in to our quizzing session, prayed, and began. We lost pretty badly. I felt like I couldn't process the quiz master's questions as he was speaking. I felt like I didn't know how to make my thumb hit the buzzer. It was incredibly frustrating, because I know I could've beat the other team to the questions, but I was out of practice, and so we basically handed the other team the quiz.

Luckily it was double elimination, and by the time we quizzed our second quiz, which would be on Monday, Lauren, our usual captain, would be there. It didn't really matter though. It so happened that the Texas team that took first place at nationals last year lost a quiz this year, moved down to what we affectionately call "the losers' bracket," and fell into place on the matrix to quiz against us next. Needless to say, my less-than-fully-prepared team lost, thereby completing my Bible quiz career.

On Tuesday evening, we gathered for "Prayer and Share" when last year Bible quizzers give speeches, and the quizzing community prays together. I have to say, I think this year's Prayer and Share was the best I've ever been to. Even though we had 30 last year quizzers giving 5 minute speeches each, and it went on for quite a while, every speech was great. Every single one of the quizzers shared unique experiences, and every word was from the heart.

Afterward, Bro. Faubert, our national quiz master for the experienced division, spoke on "The Donkey and the Titanic." Although brief, that was a great message to hear at Prayer and Share my last year. He spoke about how we can't be content with being "one and done" and how we have to equip ourselves to make sure we're not. It was a great night overall.

Wednesday was finals. The Texas team that beat us got second place this year, and Columbus, Ohio won first. That night we had our Bible quizzing banquet where awards for teams and individuals were given.
I have to give a huge shout out to our Colorado 1 team from Abundant Life Tabernacle in Johnstown, Colorado. Michael and Elise Schroeder are the best Bible quizzers I know. Not only did they master their material, preparing themselves to be competitive at a national level, and thereby earning 4th place in the country, the highest Colorado has ever gotten, but they are also great examples of what Bible quizzers should be, dedicated to the Word of God, genuine and compassionate people. Michael also got second highest scoring quizzer on the all tournament team and quizzer of the year, an honor he deserved more than anyone.

Although my last year was bittersweet, I'm glad to be done with my years as a Bible quizzer. The five years I had were great ones, filled with memories I'll never forget, but more importantly, they grounded me in what I believe and allowed me to get to know more about the amazing God I serve.

Was I Begging for Reverse Culture Shock?

I arrived at JFK Airport in New York the evening of July 26. I didn't sleep much during the roughly 11 hour flight from Kiev. Instead, I learned 50 more verses and reviewed my Bible quizzing material for the impending national competition.

Upon arrival, my foot was hurting more than it was when we took off. I don't think I mentioned this before, but my foot began hurting and swelling the last day of camp. I wasn't sure what I did to it, and I didn't think anything of it. But it was getting worse and worse, and by the time I got to my hotel in Manhattan the evening of the 26th, I could hardly walk on it.

The next day, Friday, I would have the entire day in New York to do whatever I pleased. I first did as recommended by my mother and grandmother and went to an urgent care center to have my foot looked at. The doctor there sent me to have it xrayed, thinking it might be broken. While waiting to be called with the results, I went to the New York Public Library and blogged. I was overwhelmed as I walked around the city. One thing vastly different about America is that there are people of all colors, shapes, and appearances; Eastern Europe is less diverse to be sure. But the thing that stood out to me most was the volume. I think one thing is that my surrounding every-day conversation for the past few weeks has been in languages I don't understand, and suddenly I could hear everything around me. But another thing is, yes, Americans speak really loudly! Plus, I was in New York city. What in the world was I thinking? Going from Vilnius to New York was not exactly an easy transition. Not only that, I was also going from being surrounded by people I know to being alone in a big city. Reverse culture shock hit me in that I probably looked like a deer in the headlights the entire day. When people I didn't know smiled or spoke to me, I thought it was the strangest thing because that doesn't happen in Eastern Europe. It was all very interesting.
Later that day, the doctor called to tell me my foot might be fractured, but there was nothing that could be done; however, I should stay off of it and ice it.

That was almost funny. I was travelling to St. Louis the next day for Bible quizzing nationals in which we dress up, and I was planning on wearing high heels. I was also planning on playing volleyball. And then I had a long road trip home. Staying off of my foot was not really an option.

As for my evening, I decided to take a walk over to the Empire State Building, which was a short 8 blocks away. I had to do something while I was in New York. What was I going to do? Be content with a doctor appointment and sitting in a library? No, I went to the 86th floor of the Empire State Building where I was met with a great view.


But this view was one that made me miss the views in Vilnius more than anything. Being the exact opposite, a busy, noisy, bright city, this New York view made me long for the smaller, quieter, more peaceful town surrounded by hillsides sprawling with forests in Vilnius.

Upon getting back to the hotel, I received a phone call informing me that my flight to Chicago (where I had a connecting flight to St. Louis) was cancelled. It ended up being a good thing, giving me a direct flight out of Laguardia, to which I could catch a shuttle for $20, instead of my flight to Chicago O'Hare from Westchester, to which I was going to have to pay about $120 cab fare. So I was actually grateful for the flight cancellation.

Saturday afternoon, I got on the plane, excited to see my friends in St. Louis.

The Longest Day of my Life

When I say, "The Longest Day of my Life," I mean it quite literally. Thursday, July 26, was 31 hours for me. It started probably around the time I was getting my things together at camp. I left with Adyva and Darius after midnight, went to the Millers' house to get my bigger suitcase, went to Adyva and Darius's apartment, repacked everything, showered, slept for about 30 minutes, and got up to go to the airport. My flight left at 5:35am. I slept for another 30 minutes on the way to Kiev, Ukraine, and once there, I actually went through passport control so I could leave the airport during my 6 and a half hour layover.
Maryna, who I'd met at ISM, came to the airport to meet me, and we took a bus to a subway station, then a subway to the city center. We got to walk around and talk for a couple hours before turning back and making the nearly hour-long journey back to the airport. It was a good way to pass the time, and a lot better than spending 6 hours in the airport.
My flight to New York left at 1:35pm. My time was spent cramming in Bible verse after Bible verse, still preparing for nationals. The flight arrived to JFK airport around 5:40 that evening, making it a little more than 11 hours total.
By this point, I was completely exhausted, and by the time I got to my hotel, I made a few phone calls and called it a night at after 11pm.

Awakening...

Warning: This will be another long post.

Sunday was a day of fun, fellowship, and friends. We had an awesome church service with guest speaker Pastor Adrian Smith from Stockholm, Sweden, and we had a great time afterwards. One of the Portuguese students who I met at ISM, Joao, actually came to the church service and spent time with our group after, and he loved it.

But Monday was what we were really all waiting for, Awakening Camp 2012.

I'm sure there are several people who could join me in saying that Monday I could hardly contain my excitement for camp. I've seen some of the work that's gone into the camp, and I couldn't wait to see all the good things that would come out of it. I knew it would be good just from the level of excitement in the air. There were kids everywhere who had been sponsored for the camp, and I found it moving how grateful they were. I took this from a post in Shasta and Tony Miller's facebook group. It's one of a few similar messages she let me read. I want to share it with you just to show a piece of what went on:

Marike:
Dear Shasta I cant go to the camp but I really want to be there, for me it's to expensive what should I do? -.-

Shasta Miller:
Are you coming with the group from Klaipedia? Are you riding with them?

Marike:
Yes with my sister dania but I don't have money to pay for the camp that's my problem

Shasta Miller:
Come & we will take care of your camp stay.

Marike:
Really serious ?

Shasta Miller:
Yes come
If its ok with your pastor

Marike:
To take me to the camp?

Shasta Miller
Yes.

Marike:
Yes they will take and last question I don't need money for the camp? It will be free?

Shasta Miller
Yes for you free

Marike:
Ou Thank you very very Shasta !! I'm love that camp and I like spend my time there with god and lots of people!

That was the story of several students, and I'm sure they and the Millers were very thankful for the several sponsors that made camp possible for them. My first "awakening" was related to this. Every year, most of the people from Colorado can afford every youth camp, youth convention, youth retreat, etc. and we think nothing of it. We always have a few sponsored, but it seems to be no big deal. Contrarily, thankfulness simply eminates from these students who couldn't afford it, but still were given the opportunity to be a part of what God would do.

Camp would begin on Monday. That morning, Amber and I hurriedly packed smaller bags (as ours were both too big to need to take to camp), and before we knew it, we were out the door with Tyler, Taylor, and Adomas, a friend of theirs. We all walked to the bus station, caught a bus, on which we ran into Raimonda, Rasika, and her girls, and went to the train station. We bought tickets to Trakai and waited with the group of about 25 headed to camp. Once in Trakai, Shasta drove their minivan back and forth from the train station to the campgrounds, taking loads of people at a time. Others arrived gradually, from Estonia, Latvia, and Norway.

When Monday evening came around, I was more than ready for church. I don't know that I'm good at singing in Lithuanian, but I can manage. Evelina and I, who had been practicing together, were joined by Benidicte and Miriam, sisters from Norway. Worship service took a little getting used to for some of the youth, especially those who hadn't been exposed to much or any Pentecostal church before. Jonathan Briggs, from Norway, preached that night, and it was the beginning of some awesome messages. Afterward, we all played volleyball, since it was still light out. Tuesday and Wednesday were just as good.

Youth camps in Colorado are great, don't get me wrong, but this was something else. Youth camp in Colorado is expected I guess, we're all used to it, maybe too used to it. And although every year it seems to get better, and we have great moves of God, it seems that at least some of the people start off with an indifferent attitude at first. Of course, there's also that "last night" mindset, where some people just go through the motions for the first few nights and then try to break through on the last night. It wasn't like that here. These kids don't get a huge youth event every few months like we do back home. We go from youth camp, to Shift, to Holiday Youth Convention to youth retreats and hyphen events etc. and we have youth services regularly enough. Here, this is the big thing. Camp is something everyone comes to already excited beyond belief. Every service, people worship and take it all in, even if they're a little hesitant about our worship style. People show up to morning prayer, looking forward to talking to God before breakfast. They're excited to clap and sing, they're excited to hear what the preachers have to tell them. Of course, the sports and games and fun bring tons of excitement too, but my point is, the entire mindset of everyone there made me think, maybe we don't appreciate what we have enough. That was another "awakening" moment.

I was given the opportunity to have personal conversations with many of the students at the camp...

The first was on Monday night, when a girl walked into the room I was sharing with six others and asked somewhat timidly, "Um, excuse me, but does anyone know how to do hair nice?"
We were all rushing to get ready as it was, but after a moment of silence I was first to volunteer with a, "Yes, I can do it," and she proceeded to ask me if I'd do her hair.

Her hair was beautiful, long, blonde, and thick. And before even an introduction she asked me, "So, you don't cut your hair, right?"

This is true. We Pentecostal girls are known for our uncut hair, among other things. I've heard a lot of things in response to this, but it's not a cultish thing and it's not legalistic either; it's in the Bible, it's not forced, it's a personal faith thing. Yes, there are standards we choose to live by, like uncut hair, no makeup, no jewelry, no pants, etc., but especially in foreign missions works, they aren't emphasized a lot, at least not at first. Shasta explained to some of us Pentecostal girls who have been in this for all our lives and have all the standards down that they deal with it on a personal and individual basis and they let people come to them about it, not the other way around.

So when Daniella asked me about my hair, I kind of proceeded with caution. "Right, I don't cut it," I said.
"Will you tell me why?" she asked.
"Well," I began, "the Bible says that your hair is a gift from God. And it's for a covering and it's your glory." That made her smile, and I continued, "so I wouldn't want to cut it, because God has given it to me, and why would I want to get rid of any of it?"
"That makes sense," she said. "I've been thinking that maybe I shouldn't cut mine again."
"That's for you to decide, but I think that's a good idea," I told her.
I did Daniella's hair the next night too, and the last night, she watched me do some other girls' hair and tried to do Amber's to practice.

Doing hair became a regular thing for me. By my last day there, I had over ten girls' hair to do. I put my own pins, flowers, headbands, and clips in their hair, as many of them didn't have any of that sort of thing. Even with the big box of pins I had, I still had to have Tony get some for me when he went into town. Daniella was so cute, after she learned the word "pins" she had to tell all the girls what they were called. I learned that they call hairbands and pins and things like that "guma" or "gum," so learning the English word "pins" was cool for her. The girls said I had golden hands. Although it was tiring doing hair for hours, I didn't really mind. Every one of them thanked me several times, hugged me, and were happy about their hair. It was something special for them, and that's all that mattered to me. Of course I told them that they shouldn't let their hair stop them from worshipping, to jump and clap and everything just like they normally would.

Because of all the hair-doing, I had a few more conversations about hair cutting and coloring, which I answered with care and sesitivity. I was glad the girls were asking though.

Other questions came as a result of Bible quizzing. Since nationals is right around the corner, I had my Bible quizzing cards with me pretty much 24/7, learning another one whenever I had a few minutes, looking over them at meals, and getting people to let me quote to them whenever I could. Many people asked what the cards were and if they could see them. They all loved the concept of Bible quizzing and wanted to know how they could do it. (When I go back to Lithuania, we just might have to start it up there...)

So another opportunity for sme question answering came when I walked by Christa, from Norway, and Ruta, from Klaipedia. Christa has been in church a little longer, I think, and she was trying to answer Ruta's many questions. She called me over because she thought I would know how to answer better since I know a lot of Bible verses. The first thing was showing Ruta a verse about why we only wear skirts. Christa could almost quote Deuteronomy 22:5, but didn't know where it was to show Ruta. That is indeed a Bible quizzing verse this year, so I went right to it. After that, Ruta followed with questions about jewelry. Then we moved inside so I could start doing hair, hers being first. There she asked about tons of other things, and Amber, who came to keep me company while doing hair, was glad to help me answer. I loved her spirit about the whole thing. She was just curious, hungry to know more, looking for answers, and looking in the right place, the Bible.

My last night there, Wednesday, Eimantas and Ugne joined us at Bajambalessodyba (where the camp was). Tyler Miller had met Eimantas a couple weeks ago and invited him to church. He came and brought his girlfriend, Ugne, with him. They loved it. After their first service, he said, "I have no words. Only wow!"

So it was great to see them at camp. Since we had coffee and apple pie squares after church, I went and sat by Ugne. She had just witnessed her first baptisms, and she had questions about it. I did my best at explaining without overwhelming, and we had a great conversation. She really likes Tony and Shasta's church, and she says Eimantas does too. She told me about their church, which is Catholic, and she said that it's like it's dead and Vilnius Slovinimo Namai is alive. She said it's different because they can feel happiness and joy at Tony and Shasta's church, and they're so nice and sweet. I loved getting to talk to her more.

My camp experience culminated with a bonfire. We had fun singing and playing games there. I let a few tears out and only consoled myself in the fact that I will most definitely be coming back.

Over the course of the three days I was at camp, several young people received the Holy Ghost, and six people were baptized.


The entire thing was just so touching. I'm thankful I got the chance to be a part of this.

Amber and Alex

First of all, my apologies for the delayed updates in blogging. I was at youth camp where blogging was not an option. So here we go, from last Saturday...

There were a couple people from America coming in for the camp, and Saturday and Sunday nights I would be sharing a room with one of them. That's pretty much all I knew. Saturday morning when I woke up, AnnaRose and Jessica had both already left the hostel. The room looked empty. After I had packed my things and moved them out, it looked even emptier, with only Jessica's things left there.

The Millers picked me up, the two Americans already with them. I was introduced to Amber and Alex from Maine. We headed to the church to meet Rasika, a Lithuanian lady who goes to Vilnius Slovinimo Namai and is a certified tour guide. She would be giving Amber and Alex a tour that day, since the next day would be church, and then we would all be at camp near Trakai. We started the day off right, with prayer and worship, and I thought it was a wonderful way to begin the next little section of my journey (no longer studying, but now in preparation for camp).

After getting something to eat, Rasika, Amber, Alex, and I walked around old town Vilnius, a place I've become used to and now know my way around. We saw the Cathedral, the Palace of the Grand Dukes, Gediminas Tower, St. Anne's Church, Stikliu where the Jewish Ghetto used to be, Vilnius University, the Gates of Dawn, Town Hall, and ended our tour at the KGB Museum, where I hadn't been yet. It was quite gruesome, and I now completely understand why Shasta and Tony said when they take people there, they feel sick afterwards.

We finished the night out with spending time together, everyone chatting, including Toby, the Millers' dog.
Amber and I were sharing the guest bedroom at the Millers' house, and we started a pretty good friendship. We stayed up for a long time just talking, as girls do. Although I had been surrounded with a bunch of girls before, it was comforting to have another church girl, and one from the States too, to talk to.

Kryzus Kalnas

Ever since I saw a picture in the "Looking at Lithuania" book we checked out from the library, I really wanted to go to The Hill of Crosses. Unfortunately, it's in Siauliai, which is over 200 km. from Vilnius. One of the other girls from UNC went to see it last week one day, and she said it was completely worth it. Friday was my opportunity, so I looked into bus and train schedules.

I left the hostel a little after 6 in the morning to walk to the train station. After asking a particularly helpful gentleman at the train station, I bought my ticket. My train left Vilnius at 6:45 and arrived in Siauliai around 9:20. I again asked questions and figured out how to get to the bus station, which was about a 10 minute walk in the rain. Luckily, I had my umbrella with me. After encountering more helpful people and finding out the bus I would take would leave at 10:25, I went into a shopping center and bought something I could eat for lunch later on. The bus ride was only 3 litas, and the bus driver let me know where to get out. The elderly lady I was sitting next to told me, "Kryzus Kalnas, walk there," and pointed at a road trailing off the main road.

I was a little concerned. It looked like I was in the middle of no where, I couldn't see even a glimpse of a hill, and it was pouring rain. I ended up walking with a Japanese lady who had gotten off of the bus as well. It was about a 2 km walk, and in the rain that was a lot worse. I don't think my friends and family in Colorado can quite comprehend the magnitude of the rain here. It's crazy! Even with the umbrella, I was soaking wet by the time I saw the hill in the distance.

Words cannot describe the wonder of that place. There are thousands, maybe millions of crosses. There are literally crosses hanging on crosses hanging on crosses. It's hard to even fathom. To me, it was a symbol of a solid, unwavering, undying, persistent faith tying together generations of people from several cultures and beliefs. It's simply amazing.

When I got back, I went straight to the church for music practice. It was our last, as camp starts on Monday. I have to say, singing in Lithuanian, a language I didn't know a word of before this trip, has been quite the challenge. But I'm getting there... I think.

Later that night, we said goodbye to Maryna, our new friend from Ukraine. AnnaRose and I walked her to the bus station, where she left around 10.

We then spent Anna's last night in Vilnius just hanging out and relaxing. We grabbed a snack and walked the streets until dark, so we could get some pictures of the Cathedral at night.

Back at the hostel, there were only three of us girls left. AnnaRose would leave at 4 the next morning, and Jessica would leave the next night. I would leave the next day to stay with the Millers until camp. We talked a little about our days. Jessica had gone with a couple others to the Soviet statue park and to a zoo. AnnaRose had gone to the castle at Trakai with Maryna. After telling each other about our adventures, we all said our goodbyes and went to sleep, content.